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Passengers are advised to use alternative routes just bloody well walk to work, ok?

It occurred to me this morning, on my inadvertently circuitous route to work resulting from the Victoria and Northern lines both being broken, that this standard piece of London Underground advice is utterly pointless. It essentially equates to saying:

“The such and such a line is not working, so passengers are advised not to use it (which they, er, won’t be able to do anyway)”.

Even worse, though, is that if like today the alternative route that you might otherwise have taken is also broken, then why bother saying it at all? It’s rather like those patronising apologies from a computer on the South West Trains network. In fact, why don’t we replace this announcement with something more realistic, like: “Passengers are advised to give up on getting to work today at all; why don’t you just go home and go back to bed…”.