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If RiverSoft made e-voting machines

These leaked emails from Diebold, reported widely on the web, but strangely not in the traditional media, make pretty scary reading. Diebold manufacture electronic voting apparatus (used widely in the US, including the 2000 presidential elections).

Read the excerpts to get a taster:

“Elections are not rocket science. Why is it so hard to get things right! I have never been at any other company that has been so miss [sic] managed.”

In response to a question about a presentation in El Paso County, Colorado: “For a demonstration I suggest you fake it. Progam them both so they look the same, and then just do the upload fro [sic] the AV. That is what we did in the last AT/AV demo.”

“I have become increasingly concerned about the apparent lack of concern over the practice of writing contracts to provide products and services which do not exist and then attempting to build these items on an unreasonable timetable with no written plan, little to no time for testing, and minimal resources. It also seems to be an accepted practice to exaggerate our progress and functionality to our customers and ourselves then make excuses at delivery time when these products and services do not meet expectations.”

“I feel that over the next year, if the current management team stays in place, the Global [Election Management System] working environment will continue to be a chaotic mess. Global management has and will be doing the best to keep their jobs at the expense of employees. Unrealistic goals will be placed on current employees, they will fail to achieve them. If Diebold wants to keep things the same for the time being, this will only compound an already dysfunctional company. Due to the lack of leadership, vision, and self-preserving nature of the current management, the future growth of this company will continue to stagnate until change comes.”

“[T]he bugzilla historic data recovery process is complete. Some bugs were irrecoverably lost and they will have to be re-found and re-submitted, but overall the loss was relatively minor.”

“If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.”

“I need some answers! Our department is being audited by the County. I have been waiting for someone to give me an explanation as to why Precinct 216 gave Al Gore a minus 16022 when it was uploaded. Will someone please explain this so that I have the information to give the auditor instead of standing here “looking dumb”.”

“…They need this, to prove to the media, as well as, any candidates & lawyers, that they did not view or print any Election Results before the Polls closed. However, if there is a way that we can disable the reporting functionality, that would be even better.”

The tone of a lot of the emails sounds rather familiar, and reminds me very much of the sort of correspondence that used to go round at a certain, now-defunct, software company that I used to work for. As Ben says:

“The tone of the “managers” reminds me of companies I’ve worked for. They’ve inherited a ramshackle system of desperate, last-minute hacks, and take pride in their knowledge of how to work around all the problems. Look at how any problem report is answered by a long, rambling explanation of how the system works, followed by another improvised fix.”

Doesn’t exactly fill you with confidence for the democratic process, really, now does it.

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Take my wife, no please, take her…

Today (and much of yesterday for that matter) I have been spending far too much time hitting “refresh” on the tickets-for-sale page of the aussie-in-London listings website gumtree, in a vain attempt to get myself a last-minute ticket for tonight’s Powderfinger gig at Shepherd’s Bush Empire. (Entirely my own fault, of course, since I passed up a number of opportunities to (a) buy one when they weren’t sold out or (b) grab one of the ones my friends picked up, but it was only at the weekend that I decided that I actually wanted to go after all).

While looking through the site, though, I was highly amused to read this posting:

Radiohead – Dublin 4th December Free Ticket!!!

Ok here is the score. I purchased two Radiohead tickets for my girlfriend and I to go to Dublin and see them on December 4th.

She is a Radiohead fanatic, unfortunately I am not!. We are both planning to go to Dublin and my plan is for her to go to the gig and for me to sit in a bar and not be bored to death by Yorke and co (sorry!).

So if anyone wants to come over and see the gig with my girlfriend then please mail me, you will obviously have to pay your own travel and accommodation but the ticket is free. Let me know if your interested.”

What kind of a relationship do these people have that he would rather drink on his own (while some random stranger off the interwebnet takes his girlfriend to a gig by the band she loves) than suffer the indignity of having to listen to an hour or so of Thom Yorke? Would you put up with this if your partner did it to you?

I notice he says that “we are both planning to go to Dublin”, but that “my plan is for her to go…”. Do you think she even knows about this?

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Classic Newsnight: Did You Threaten To Overrule Him? (links to Real Player video)

Tom Watson has more on Michael Howard here. It’s worth a read, in case you need your memory jogging about the nasty little man who will be leader of the opposition (but, god help us, hopefully never the country). The man introduced the poll tax and clause 28. He’s pro-war, anti-abortion, against a woman’s right to statutory maternity leave, opposes the Human Rights Act…

“AND – remember Michael Howard sat through 14 years of Tory Government (from his election in 1983) loyally voting to privatise the railways, water, electricity and gas, sell off School Playing Fields, cut benefits, install the internal market into the NHS, run down public services and destroy local democracy not to mention presiding over the worst recession for decades, the spectacular failures over economic policy starting with Sterling’s ejection from the ERM and the spectre of negative equity… And in opposition this is the man who has voted against the London Mayor, National Minimum Wage, the New Deal, against devolution to Scotland and Wales, against all of Labour’s budgets and against paid holidays for all workers, full time rights for all workers and the vast majority of all the Government’s achievements over the last 6 years.”

Oh, and he also said last year that he’d never stand for Tory leader again.

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Enfield Mormons: Missed blog opportunity

It was only after I’d said “Sorry mate, no thanks” and started walking away, that I realised I should have stopped and listened to what the man had to say, if only for its comedy blog entry potential. Unfortunately, when a young, smartly-dressed, American chap approached me in the street this lunchtime with the opening gambit: “excuse me, we’re from the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day…”, I didn’t even let him get out the rest of the name before I’d, in retrospect possibly rather rudely, stopped him and walked away. It was so utterly unexpected, though, that it rather threw me off. I’ll try to do better next time so I have some amusing anecdote to relate.

Then again, it’s rather arrogant of me, I suppose, to assume he wanted to save me. Maybe he was just asking directions. Sadly, I’ll never know.

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I often wonder why I don’t see as many famous people as you’d really expect, what with living in London and all. I wonder if maybe it’s just that I’m either not really paying attention to the people around me, or don’t think that anyone I might have seen is really who I think they might be. I can claim to have spotted Richard E. Grant in Richmond, for example, only because someone I was with shouted “look! there’s Richard E. Grant!” [I think maybe he heard us, because he promptly turned down a side street and skipped off into the distance. Then again, maybe he’s just a bit odd.]

The only “famous” person I can guarantee having seen without someone else’s assistance wasn’t actually very famous at all [that would be Lauren out of Neighbours, who was on the same Picadilly line train as me one day shortly after I moved to London–I can only say for certain that it was her because she was talking loudly on her mobile about the shabby British student “comedy” film she had just been in. Don’t worry, you won’t have heard of that either.]

So I can only tell you that we shared a bar at Heathrow airport on Saturday evening with former Olympic runner Cathy Freeman (and her boyfriend, Joel Edgerton), because Sal (who’s flight we were waiting for) said: “oh did you see Cathy Freeman over there?”. Even then, I didn’t believe her at first, but given that they were watching the Aussie Rules exhibition match at the Oval the other week, it’s probably a fairly safe bet.

Maybe in the future I should have someone with me at all times to point out things that I would otherwise miss.